Err dude, Your Girlfriend is most Probably Cheating on You

In I spied... on November 28, 2011 at 1:39 pm

Considering that my core readership is presumably female, this post might not be a good idea. I guess you could say I’m betraying the code of the sisterhood– whatever that is. But lately, I’ve felt my loyalties stretched.

Two wonderful male friends have recently been blindsided by the fairer sex and I must admit that watching from the sidelines, it was extremely frustrating.

I wanted to shake them, slap a load of sense into them and send anonymous texts saying, “Are you blind?! She’s met someone else!” But as life goes, one must let nature take its course.

I’ve been having a Google on the internet to see what kind of advice there is for men on this subject only to find that it was all pretty useless (most likely because it’s all written from the point of view of an angry guy who’s just been cheated on). The truth is, men are at a great disadvantage when it comes to detecting a woman’s dishonesty. From the beginning of society as we know it, us women have been trained to smell a rat while men have been stuck in the dark ages, powerless to the femme fatale.

So here it is (sorry girls but trust me when I say it’s for the greater good of womankind too) … Boys, it’s time to wise-up….

5 Cold, Hard Truths About Women that Men Should keep in Mind.

1. Women are Just as Capable of being Unfaithful as Men are.

Women crave attention just as much if not more than men crave sex. Do we agree on this? (Come on, just look at our Facebook statuses). So with these attention-craving signals constantly being emitted to all sorts of things like ex-boyfriends, sexy co-workers, the boyfriend’s best mate– surely one of them is going to take the bait. And voila, the temptation is born; we are faced with the decision to resist or not to resist and that brings me to my next question.. Who was the weaker sex at giving into temptation? Well I believe Adam seeked it out, but it was Eve who ate the apple.

2. Women are Probably Better at Cheating than Men are.

Throughout history, women have always been the victim of infidelity. Men are the cheaters, the liars, the casanovas, the players, the husbands with five wives or double lives– that’s just the way it’s always been, right? And that’s exactly how women have slipped under the radar.
If a man is acting suspicious, we as women almost immediately suspect cheating and bring out the spy gadgets.
If a woman starts to act suspicious, men are naive enough to believe it’s just our ‘female emotions’ they will surely never be able to understand (eyes roll).
We are the underdogs in the world of infidelity but in fact, men are not very successful cheaters. We’ve been tracking you, monitoring your deviant ways for centuries and as a result, we know every trick in the book and can do it ten times better if we want to! Stop kidding yourselves.
The biggest self-proclaimed playboy of them all, Hugh Hefner, learnt the hard way…

3. Women will just about Never be completely Honest about Why they’re Really Dumping You*

*Unless of course you were cheating on her.

Like I said, as far back as we can remember, we have always been the victim of men’s infidelities and well yes, quite frankly, we’d like to keep it that way. Hey, no one likes to be the bad guy and hurt those that love us and even more so, no one likes admitting to being a big fat cheater.
But there’s another reason why we might never admit we’re trading one man in for another.
For a woman to be caught cheating, emotionally or physically, it’s far more shocking and scandalous, whether society likes to admit it or not. And it’s certainly more rare for a man to forgive a woman’s infidelities than it is for a woman to take back her cheating husband (thank you Hillary Clinton and countless other so-called female role models).
A woman doesn’t want to admit she’s leaving you for someone else because she’s afraid that if the shit hits the fan with the new guy, there is very little chance you would forgive her and take her back. It’s that alpha male pride thing– we get it.
In fewer words, not being honest with you is a woman’s insurance policy.
Indeed, it is risky business for a woman breaking up with a man that loves her. It can be scary out there in the cold, bleak world of dating. But if we manage to pull the wool over your eyes, you’ll be there with open arms, none the wiser and everything goes back to the way it was.
Of course, we won’t have learnt the consequences of our actions and given enough time, will do it all over again…
But the one thing both men and women never seem to remember is that the truth always comes out.

4. If a Woman is really, truly in Love, she doesn’t give a shit about much else.

♣ I have too much going on in my life, I’m exhausted ♣ 
♣ Work is just too stressful for me to be a relationship right now, I need to focus on my career  ♣ 
♣ I need to find myself ♣
Any of these break-up lines familiar?
The fact is, when a woman is in love, these kind of things don’t stop us from wanting to be with you. Okay maybe we don’t entirely stop giving a shit about everything else, but women by nature put love and affection very high on their list of priorities. We’re also pretty good at juggling things– just take working mothers for an example. And so if you find that we suddenly don’t want your time, love and affection because we need to “focus” on something else, chances are we’re focusing on someone else.
It’s very cunning in fact, because the ‘femme fatales’ manage to not only get away scott-free with the dishonesty but manage to make you feel sorry for her too. Stop trying to convince her to stay and walk, very quickly, away.

5. A Huge Chunk of Women in this World are Masochists

Why would she choose the slimy rich guy with the hairy back over me?
There’s a reason why she broke up with her ex-boyfriend– she told me all 500 of them! So why would she get back with him?
But we were so happy, since when is my love not enough?
All very good questions my friends.
A lot of people will tell you that “girls love bad boys”. But this is just the sugar-coated truth. Unfortunately, the real and more honest reason that we end up with the wrong guy, repeatedly go back to the wrong guy or cheat with the wrong guy, is quite simply because of low self-esteem.
Female society likes to label it our hopeless addiction to ‘bad boys’ and make it look wild and glamorous while masking the fact that we just don’t have the confidence to believe we deserve someone good and kind and loyal. In my opinion (you don’t have to agree), modern women are experts at channeling low self-esteem into several masochistic forms– bullying, jealousy, exhibitionism, plastic surgery, promiscuity, harmful relationships and of course, infidelity.
Coming to terms with this is a step in the right direction. We cannot be honest with others until we’re honest with ourselves.

Before you go, this might explain a few things about us girls.

  1. Just wanted to congratulate to yet another glorious post, and to make you aware that youve got at least one male reader who follows your blog! Keep up the good work!

  2. Thanks so much David!! 😀

  3. Loved this- titillating and astute 😉

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